- Changing habits is hard for two reasons - We try to change the wrong things - We try to changing things in the wrong ways - There are 3 layers to any behavior change - Outcome - results ie. Weight loss - Process - systems / routines ie. regularly doing dishes - Identity - belief / worldview / self-awareness ie. "I am not a smoker" - Typically people focus on the outputs in their habits - Shift the focus from outputs changing identity to identity changing outputs - Example: "No thanks, I'm trying to quit" vs. "No thanks, I'm not a smoker." - Outcomes are what we want to achieve - Identity is who we want to be, or who we see ourselves as - It's extremely difficult to change habits without changing the underlying beliefs / self-identity - Two different modes - "I want to achieve this" - "I want to become this" - Behavior is a reflection of identity - When behavior and identity are in alignment it's much easier to continue habits because "I'm just being who I am." - Good habits can make rational sense, but if they conflict with our self-identity they will never truly be actionable - The more you repeat a behavior the more you reinforce the underlying identity - Every action you take is a "vote" for the person you want to be, and this works both ways good actions and bad. - Change is a two step process: - Decide who you want to be - Prove it to yourself with small wins and actions - Good news, you're not set in stone and you can change if you want. --- Source: